The Morning Wood - 1/19/2007

Stud: Dikembe Mutumbo
Way to step out and fight the evil of ageism! Deke is looking to speak with David Stern to stop announcers/”analysts” from discussing/joking about his age. Who cares if he was alive during WWII? If he says he’s 40, he’s 40. Are you going to argue with him and his razor sharp elbows? I didn’t think so. Regardless of if he’s 40 or 60, the Mount has been putting in working in Yao’s absence. Check it out from 12/27 on.

Dud:
Picking one dude for a dud today is difficult, especially with Bill “Stink Fish” Parcells pulling a favre on the Cowboys, Shaq being a fat bastard and taking forever to return, and K-Fed actually being involved with a commercial making fun of how he is going to return to being a white trash hand job any day now but the DUD of the day has to go to Barry Bonds. No one wants to hear if you think Pete Rose and Mark McGwire belong in the Hall of Fame or not. Is it a good move for you to draw attention to yourself at this point when your name is more green related than Bruce Banner at this point and you’re a sneeze away from being indicted? Also, how about you just worry about the fact that you still don’t have a signed contract for the ’07 season yet and let the holy fat journalists worry about who is getting into the Hall. Not that they have any right to either. I’m hatin’!

Talk Around The Cooler:
Oh no, the flu has hit the Patriots locker room! Just something else to stack the odds against a team that is so underappreciated and ignored by the NFL, the fans, and the media. Now even their immune systems aren’t giving them the respect that they deserve! Or maybe the NFL purposely let the flu into their locker room! I can’t wait until this becomes some type of rallying point for the Patriots and they use it to motivate themselves this weekend to beat the Colts! Influenza leads to Invincibility! Enough is enough. The Patriots are a great team and they receive respect from everyone in the league so let’s see what happens on Sunday but let’s not pay much attention to the lack of respect/antibodies/Vitamin C in New England’s direction. I have a sore throat! I’m still bringing it!

Quick Hits:
Why do I assume that this best offer involves beer and pork rinds? I can’t really blame Rolen: LaRussa’s a douche bag. That's all I got for today. Boring boring night in sports.