The Morning Wood - 06/26/2006

Stud: Ben Curtis.
Where have you been lately Benny boy? Every since you won the 2003 British Open, I thought you had gone the way of Dustin Diamond. But then you come back to drop a -23 on the field at Booz Allen Classic with the only thing slowing you up being the rain. Congratulations on renewed relevance.

Honorable Mention: Tad Iguchi.
7 RBI's in the 8th and 9th inning of last night's loss to the Astros. As Ozzie Guillen said it best "Sammo Hung was the only non cornholer in our lineup tonight!"



Dud: NCAA Basketball Coaches
I don't know what it is, I can't even think of a clear cut loser this morning. Have I lost my edge? Is the summer getting to my nasty side? Is everyone in sports playing up to their potential? I need these questions answered. However, I don't need 128 teams in my office pool, errr, NCAA tournament. I already have a difficult enough time picking the winners in my brackets, ummm, watching the games. Let's not let every team in here. Life is about not getting picked, watching as someone better than you gets an opportunity that you will never get. Kind of the way I felt when Uncle Jesse bagged Rebecca Romijn. Do your players a favor, have them learn what failure is early and often. Okay, I think my edge is back.

Talk Around the Cooler:
Joe Mikulik (possibly pronounced Mic You Lick, which would be great) is a pyscho. This is a must watch video, especially the part where he struggles to pull second base out of the ground. Just like a young man trying to take a bra off for the first time.

Wimbledon starts today. Tim Henman is the odds on favorite to win one match in the women's bracket. Roger Federer has won the last three championships. Woof.

Quick Hits...
Beckham bent it and then vomited several times, thinking of Ginger Spice's face. In a related story, I wouldn't mind bending IT on Keira Knightley's tonsils. Barry Bonds is day to day after hurting his knee jumping from the 6th to the 7th circle of hell. Jeff Samardzija, Notre Dame white receiver, was recently signed by the Chicago Cubs, which is not only very impressive for an already talented football player, but it also has Nike excited for a whole line of "Samardzija knows Samardzija" commercials. Former Red Sox prospect Anibal Sanchez shut down the Yankees in the Stadium last night. Normally this would anger me, but it looks like Butterball Sanchez is quickly waddling down the Sid Fernandez training path. Welcome to the week bitches