The Morning Wood - 05/31/2006

Stud(s) :
Vernon Wells: 3-4, 3 HR's, 4R's, 1BB and 10 groupies last night. He's simply that damn good no need to criticize him

Corey Patterson: His two homeruns last night were all well and good, but his homer-stealing catch was the coup du grace.

Dud:
Andy Roddick: Just because you weren't the first to boink Mandy Moore and this guy was doesn't mean you can pack it in (shout out to all the contestants on the god awful "Yo Momma!"). Roddick retired in the first round of the French Open with an ankle injury. He's won zero majors since he and Mandy Moore broke up. Mandy's racquet "head game" must be unbelievable.

Talk Around the Cooler...
Roger Clemens comes to an agreement with the Astros. Or is that not the case? Clemens' Brett Favre impersonation has gone on way too long. The rampant rebuttals of his signing with the Astros are only indication that he already has.

Miami Heat vs. Detroit Pistons: There's nothing like watching a mutiny in progress.

Barry Bonds has feelings: He's only human, guys. A SUPER-human, that is...bet you all didn't know that when he cries, those aren't tears, it's actually the clear seeping through his pores.

Quick Hits...
Soccer players need love too. You can get all kinds of things on eBay. She's my "bullpen catcher, gosh! Please don't tell, my wife."

One more thing...I can't stand it when every player that has the most minor of injuries plays during the playoffs and is inevitably compared to Willis Reed. Hyperbole is getting out of control these days. I say that excluding commentators such as Bill Walton who's had the commentating game on lock for years. Respeck...booyakashaa!!!